


I Met Someone out on the West Coast (Gotta Get Back, I Can't Let This Go)

by wherehopelies



Series: I'd Rather Be With You (Say You Want the Same Thing Too) [3]
Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Bemily Week 2019, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, Long-Distance Relationship, cynthemily friendship tho amirite, cynthia rose makes one brief appearance, its mostly just soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-14
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-11-18 02:21:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18111293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wherehopelies/pseuds/wherehopelies
Summary: "Soon their time apart stretched to one month, two months, three months, four months. The darkness in Beca had built a fortress in her chest, sucking her optimism dry. Maybe they could handle it if there was some kind of timeline to the madness, but as far as Beca could tell, they were on a road that stretched indefinitely into the future and she couldn’t see any kind of end in sight."for bemily week 2019 day 4: long distance





	I Met Someone out on the West Coast (Gotta Get Back, I Can't Let This Go)

**Author's Note:**

> song is saturday sun by vance joy. big thanks to moxiemorton for reading this ahead of time and giving me advice :)

Most days, Beca could coast by on texts and short FaceTime calls. Most days, that’s all they got. Opposite schedules and a three hour time difference made it a little hard, but nobody said 2200 miles apart would be easy.

Some days, they were lucky if they could even catch each other at the same time, and on the days they couldn’t, memories were all that sustained her.

They were good memories, but not good _enough_ , not when Beca couldn’t remember the exact softness of Emily’s hair or how her ugly-laugh was the most beautiful sound Beca had ever heard. Not when she couldn’t feel Emily’s warmth at her back and not when the sweatshirt she stole the last time Emily visited had lost its Emily-smell.

No, those memories just didn’t quite cut it when Beca’d had the real thing. But some days, memories were all she had.

//

They met at a coffee shop, the most cliche of meetings Beca could ever imagine. She’d been sent to LA, just for the summer.

“I’m considering your promotion,” her boss in Atlanta had said. “But I need to get you some more cutthroat experience. I’m sending you to our sister branch in LA for a few months. You’re already more competent than anyone here - no that’s not a compliment just look at Dax, he can’t even tie his laces, he just stuffs them in his ugly hipster shoes. So look, when you come back, I’ll have an open producer spot and clients lined up for you.”

So off Beca went. The label had paid for three months of a medium-nice apartment, given her a company rental car, and sent her on her way. Her boss had been right, it was cutthroat work with long hours and clients that made her want to quit every other day. But she was in love with the music, with the job, or at least she would be, once she was heading projects and had her own clients, right?

She told herself that, over and over, for the first month she was there. She repeated it to herself at work, at home, when she was driving, when she was in line for coffee.

“Americano for Beca!”

And then -- there she was, pulling Beca from a foggy daze with a smile and the promise of caffeine.

“Cool shirt,” she was saying. “I love them. Got to see them live about two years ago.”

Beca looked down at her Bastille shirt. “Oh. Yeah they’re great.”

“I’m forever obsessed with that song Laura Palmer.”

Her nametag said Emily. She was the opposite of LA gorgeous - not blonde, not tan. She was friendly and genuine, the kind of beautiful that would knock someone senseless and she wouldn’t even know she was doing it.

“They’re playing here next month, actually.” Beca said. “I was thinking of getting tickets.”

She smiled at Beca, soft and golden. “You definitely should.”

“Are you going?”

She was already making another coffee, her hands busy, but Beca could see her smile under the brim of the black cap she wearing. “Is that a question or an invitation?”

“Uhhhh…” Beca floundered, her brain short circuiting and cheeks heating up. Had it been an invitation? She suddenly wanted it to be an invitation. “If you say yes, then an invitation. Otherwise it was annoying small talk and I’m gonna just… go.”

She laughed. Beca fell in love with the sound as quick as it takes to flip a light switch. “Latte for Dominique!” Emily set another cup on the counter next to Beca’s still untouched coffee. She picked up Beca’s cup and started to scrawl on it with Sharpie. A woman hurriedly snatched the other cup from the counter just as Emily held out Beca’s cup to her. Beca took it, her palm wrapping around the digits she could see written on the cup. “That’s my number. I get off at five.”

“This is like… a date-thing right? Like, not a straight-thing?”

Emily leaned closer, her forearms resting on the counter in front of her. “Definitely not a straight-thing.”

Beca felt her lips tug upward sharply. She tried to bite it back, to play it cool, but Emily’s smile was something else. “Okay. That’s… that’s good.”

There was a long moment of hesitation where they just looked at each other, Emily’s smile growing warmer the longer Beca stood there. Beca felt her entire body heating up under Emily’s attention.

“Emily!” A voice called from behind the counter, causing them both to jump. “You’re getting backed up.”

Emily rolled her eyes and stood up straight again. “Gotta go, Beca. Nice meeting you.”

Then she was moving away, scooping cups off the bar line as she went. Beca looked down at the bold writing on the cup, the number, the quick scrawl that said _text me_.

So Beca did.

//

It was easy after that, like Beca had met her best friend. Emily was goofy and warm, always slinging her arm over Beca’s shoulders, tugging her closer by the waist, doing embarrassing things to make Beca smile.

She was perfect and beautiful, sunshine on a Saturday morning. If Beca had known love before this then she’d forgotten it, because being with Emily was like nothing she’d ever felt. It was like carrying around a jar of happiness that she could open whenever she felt like. All she had to do was think of Emily’s laugh and everything seemed better.

//

“ _Hey_ ,” Emily’s voice tinnied through the phone. “ _I wasn’t sure I would catch you. Feels like you haven’t had a second to talk in ages._ ”

“I have a few minutes,” Beca said, pressing the phone closer to her ear. She didn’t really, but she didn’t care. She hadn’t heard Emily’s voice in three days now and she’d had a week from hell and she really needed this.

Emily yawned on the other side of the line. A look at the clock told Beca she was probably on a break at the coffee shop. Beca was running late for a meeting, sitting in her car in the parking lot.

“How are you? How’s the writing going? How’s class?”

_“It’s fine. Intensive.”_

“You sound tired.”

Emily hummed into the phone. Then she sighed. “ _I’ve just been busy. And missing you like crazy.”_

“I know. I miss you, too.”

_“How’s everything going over there?”_

“It’s… you know. Going.”

There was a pause. “ _Do you wanna talk about it?”_

Beca shrugged, even though Emily couldn’t see her. “Not really. It’s just the same old stuff. Working overtime and clients being dicks and whatever.”

_“I’m sorry, Bec_.” She could practically hear Emily’s pout through the phone.

“Are you still coming to visit over the break?”

_“I think so, but I didn’t get the tickets yet. I have to see how much money I have. I dunno. I want to, obviously.”_ There was a clang from Emily’s side of the phone, and the muffled sound of Emily saying something to someone else. _“Shoot. I’m sorry, babe, I gotta go. I’ll text you later, okay?”_

Beca bit the inside of her cheek, a swell of emotion rising in her chest, but she didn’t want to cry. “Yeah, okay. Bye.”

_“Hey. I love you.”_

“I love you, too.”

She ended the call, letting her phone violently drop into the cup holder. She glared at the clock, seeing that she was three minutes late to her meeting. She didn’t want to go. She wanted to be in LA, lazing around in bed with Emily, back in that place where talking wasn’t difficult and time was forgiving.

Now they were always missing each other, not wanting to say that it hurt to be apart, because they both already knew, and why talk about things that hurt when not talking about it hurt enough already?

Beca sighed, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath before she grabbed her phone and stepped out of her car and into the humid east coast air.

God she missed the west coast.

She missed Emily.

//

Those two months with Emily had gone by fast, but sometimes when they were alone together, in a bubble and hidden from the world, time had seemed to freeze.

Things were simple, uncomplicated. Beca worked at the label, Emily at the coffee shop, and other than that, they spent their time with each other. They drove up and down the coast, camped overnight in the car so they could see the sunrise. They spent time together in Beca’s apartment, each of them doing their own thing. Beca would mess around on her laptop, Emily would read or play her guitar or write poetry. They’d slump against the pillows in bed, watching TV, Emily’s head on Beca’s shoulder, their hands held loosely between them.

Whenever Beca felt like she was coiling too tight from work and pressure and asshole musicians, she would focus on Emily’s laugh and that coil would spring loose. When Emily would kiss her, she unraveled at the seams.

When Emily loved her, she came undone.

//

Those months, she was aware of the consequences of leaving, of going back home, but she didn’t want to think about it, always pushed it to the back of her mind. They never talked about it either, neither of them daring to bring it up.

They’d fallen into some kind of paradise, a perfect island of happiness.

It was always creeping up though, always lingering, until suddenly it was looming, present and real.

“Hey. I know this is weird, but can you give me a ride to the airport on Sunday?”

“If I say no, will you stay forever?”

Beca could only laugh as she packed up her suitcase. “I wish.”

Emily looked at her over her shoulder. She was sprawled out on her stomach in Beca’s bed in just a tank top and her underwear, her hair falling down her back in smooth waves. She was a beautiful dream. Looking at her, Beca’s heart ached in a way she didn’t know was possible. “We need to talk about this.”

“We do?”

“Yes, come here.”

Beca let the shirt she was folding fall into the suitcase and moved around the bed so she was standing in front of Emily. Emily sat up, her legs hanging over the edge of the bed. She grabbed Beca’s hands and gave them a squeeze.

“Can I ask you something?”

Beca raised an eyebrow. “That’s like, the most frustrating question ever.”

“It’s a segue, Beca. So you know we’re being serious now.”

“Serious? I don’t know her.”

Emily reached up, cupping Beca’s chin. Her thumb pressed into the corner of Beca’s frown. “How do you feel about what we’ve been doing this summer? Like, was it just a fun thing to pass the time before you went home, or what?”

Beca shrugged, feeling all sorts of weird. Talking with Emily was easier than talking to most people, but it still wasn’t her favorite thing ever. Her feelings were like some kind of blockage getting stuck in her chest. She couldn’t figure them out when she tried to say them out loud.

“Okay,” Emily said, an understanding smile tugging at her lips. She dropped her hand from Beca’s face, letting it fall across her lap. Her other hand still clasped Beca’s. “You want me to go first?”

“Yeah, okay.”

“Okay, well.” Emily looked up at her, her eyes deep and pretty. Beca both wanted and didn’t want to look away. She couldn’t either way. “This was the best summer I’ve ever had. And I think we had fun and that we just _work_ together. Things make sense with you.” She squeezed Beca’s hand again. “Now your turn.”

Beca nodded. “Yeah, I dunno. Things are easier with you, too. People don’t drive me as crazy and it’s like…” Beca glanced away, finally breaking eye contact. “It’s like I can breathe or something. You make me… happy.”

“You make me happy, too.”

“You’re always happy.”

Emily rolled her eyes playfully. “Well you make me happier.” She gave Beca a look, patient and soft. “So what do you wanna do?”

“I dunno. I mean. Like. What are we? Are we like, going strong or whatever?”

Emily laughed. “Going strong?”

“Shut up, that was the only thing my brain could think of.”

“Yeah,” Emily teased. “We’re going strong.”

“I don’t know what that means.”

“You’re the one who said it.”

Beca grunted. “Well. I don’t know what I’m talking about.”

Emily’s legs looped around Beca’s knees. She was giving Beca this smile that made her feel all melty and shy and she didn’t know what to do with herself so she closed her eyes. “Noooo, look at me.”

“No, you’re embarrassing me.”

“I’m sorry, you’re just cute.” Beca huffed, but opened her eyes. Emily let go of her, her hands crawling under Beca’s shirt and wrapping themselves in the baggy fabric. Her fingers were warm on Beca’s skin. She tugged Beca a few inches closer. “I wanna try this. Us. Do you?”

“Like be girlfriends or whatever?”

Emily hummed happily. “Yeah, or whatever.”

“Why do you have to tease me like this?”

“Because it’s so easy and you look so damn cute when I do.”

Beca rolled her eyes, but she was smiling and couldn’t stop. “I don’t like you.”

“Liar. You think I’m awesome. That’s why you asked me to go strong with you. _So_ romantic.”

“You know what.”

“No, tell me.”

Beca grumbled, any kind of response she’d had getting lost in her throat when Emily laughed. “Shut up.”

Emily’s smile turned soft and she wrapped her legs tighter around Beca, pulling her closer. She tugged on Beca’s shirt until Beca was leaning down, their lips an inch apart. “I’m gonna kiss my girlfriend now. That okay with you?”

But Beca had already leaned the rest of the way in, her arms on either side of Emily, palms flat on the bed. Emily’s legs pulled them flush together, her hands sliding further up Beca’s shirt. She tugged Beca off her feet, fully on top of her, her laugh getting caught in Beca’s mouth. Beca lost all sense of direction, of anything that wasn’t the girl who was smiling so wide they couldn’t kiss properly.

If Beca had known happiness before Emily, then she’d forgotten it, because this wasn’t something she could dream up. This was giddy, addicting, all-encompassing, can’t-breathe-properly happiness.

This was love.

//

It wasn’t so hard at first. They texted nonstop, FaceTime or Skyped every other day. They missed each other, but they were skating along on a rush of giddy infatuation that made it easier.

Then Emily’s classes picked up and Beca got more clients and their Skype calls turned to once a week, or just five minutes of FaceTime here and there. They’d still text as often as they could, but Beca was busy in the studio and Emily was always teaching or bogged down with reading.

They got some relief in October when Emily flew to Atlanta for her fall break. Beca took a few days off work and they spent time together, doing nothing, making music, enjoying each other in the simple ways they had over the summer.

On the way back to the airport, Emily apologized that things were difficult, but maybe they could see each other again at Christmas. Beca had a lump in her throat and a determination not to cry because if she cried, then Emily would cry and Beca couldn’t handle it. She said _I love you_ in the dropoff lane, her fingers clenched together and stuffed in the pocket of the hoodie she stole from Emily. Her heart felt raw with emotion, both happy and sad, and when Emily cupped her face and said it back, her little laugh a quiet secret for just them to hear, those feelings amplified inside Beca tenfold.

It hurt her to think, but she almost wished Emily hadn’t visited. It made her absence heavier, more present. Now Beca had memories of her in her apartment and not just in LA, and those memories felt extra painful when Beca was missing her. Emily reading the book that she’d left on Beca’s end table. The images of Emily sitting in her bed and playing guitar, the song still stuck in Beca’s head on a loop. The feeling of Emily pressing her into the mattress, hovering over her in the soft morning light, her laugh full and happy in the space between them. The smell of Emily on her sheets, slowly fading until Beca eventually gave in and just washed them.

She spent three nights in LA over New Year’s. Emily’s roommate threw a party and it had been fun, but Beca resented sharing Emily for the small amount of time they had together. They didn’t fight, but Beca felt a tension between them that she hadn’t felt before. The night before she left, they cuddled up together in Emily’s bed, both of them dreading the following morning when Beca would leave. Emily pressed silent tears into Beca’s chest and Beca stared sullenly at the ceiling, hating each and every one of the miles that would separate them by the next evening.

When Emily had picked Beca up at LAX, her battery had charged straight to full, her happiness overwhelming her, but the second she dropped Beca off at the airport once again, it was completely drained.

She felt a swirling darkness gathering power in her chest at the thought of going back to work, of waiting until Emily’s spring break to be reunited again. She pushed it away, but it threatened to overwhelm her, gaining strength every day.

The days passed in some kind of fretful daze. Beca told herself her she was just feeling shitty about her job because she was letting her feelings of missing Emily bleed into her work, and she told herself her depression about missing Emily was just amplified by her unhappiness at her job. It was a vicious cycle she couldn’t break free of, and her only consolation was that she’d feel better once things at work slowed down, once she was finally with Emily again.

//

Emily called her one day, upset and near-tears, having to tell Beca she couldn’t come over the break. Soon their time apart stretched to one month, two months, three months, four months. The darkness in Beca had built a fortress in her chest, sucking her optimism dry.

When they talked on the phone, Emily’s voice void of pep, the laugh Beca loved so much utterly absent, Beca didn’t know what to do.

If she had known heartbreak before this, then she’d forgotten it, because this crushing helplessness wasn’t comparable to anything she’d ever known. She wanted to make things better, to find some kind of solution, to show Emily that this pain was all temporary, but it was occurring to her more and more every day that she didn’t see any kind of change in the near future. Emily’s PhD program still had three years left and Beca’s recent promotion gave her little wiggle room for anything new.

Maybe they could handle it if there was some kind of timeline to the madness, but as far as Beca could tell, they were on a road that stretched indefinitely into the future and she couldn’t see any kind of end in sight.

//

Deep into June, they hit their anniversary. Beca didn’t have the time and Emily didn’t have the money, so they’d be spending it apart, but they’d made a plan to set the night aside and Skype.

Beca thought they’d watch a movie, or talk, or maybe Emily would play her a song on the guitar. That’s how they usually spent their Skype dates. She snuggled up in her pajamas and accepted Emily’s call, the darkness in her receding the smallest amount when Emily’s face popped up on her screen.

She took Beca’s breath away, like she always did, the kind of simple beauty that came because Emily just didn’t think about it, didn’t care either way.

“Hey,” Beca said, her eyes trying to take in as much of Emily as possible.

“Hey,” Emily said back, shooting Beca a tiny smile. It was that tiny smile that did it, the weight of sadness in the motion.

“What’s wrong?”

Emily scrunched her nose, pouting. “Nothing. Tired is all.”

Beca hesitated, leaning closer to her laptop. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

Emily glanced away, shrugging. When she looked back, her eyes were watery. “No,” she said, her voice thick.

“Em.”

Emily looked to the ceiling, exhaling sharply. She wiped her eyes, letting out a harsh laugh. “Sorry, I didn’t want to do this on our anniversary.”

“Do what?”

“Cry.”

“Oh.”

Helplessness and frustration gripped Beca tightly. She hated it. She hated being apart. She hated not being able to be there when Emily was upset. She hated that if she were there, Emily wouldn’t even be upset in the first place.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

Emily pressed her hands to her eyes. “No, I’m sorry. It’s just.” She shrugged.

“Just what?”

“Just... “ Emily sniffled, pulling the sleeves of her sweatshirt over her hands. Beca had never seen her agitated and upset like this. “I don’t know if I can do this, Bec,” she said at last.

Beca’s world came to a stop. “Oh.” She had the strange sensation she was looking down on her body from afar. “Is this -- are we breaking up?”

“ _No,”_ Emily squeaked. She twisted the sleeves tighter around her hands. “I mean. I don’t know. I don’t want to, but…” The tears were collecting thicker in her eyes now. “I’m in love with you, Bec and when I think about you, it makes me happy, but it also makes me sad. And I don’t think… I don’t think love is supposed to _hurt_ this much.”

Beca felt like her heart was barely beating. She couldn’t say anything.

“I mean, loving you and missing you like this isn’t going to just… _stop_ if we break up, but like, where are we going with this? Do we have a plan? Are we just going to keep living like this until… until I don’t even know what?”

Emily inhaled, coughing out a choked-up sob. A numbness had settled over Beca, like if she could just pause everything inside her for a second then maybe this hurt would disappear.

They sat in silence for a long time, Emily sniffling, Beca staring, tiny pinpricks of tears accumulating behind her eyes. She grit her teeth together, determined not to cry.

“I’m sorry,” Emily said eventually. “I didn’t want to do this right now, but seeing your face just made me feel like…” She wiped at the tears. “I’m sorry,” she repeated.

“It’s okay,” Beca got out at last. “It’s not your fault.”

“Let’s not break up, I’m sorry. I just don’t know what to do.”

Beca felt like a statue, like if she didn’t move she could keep her emotions at bay. “Let’s just… let’s just sleep on it.  Let’s talk about it tomorrow after we’ve had time to think about it.”

Emily nodded quickly, sucking in a big breath and wiping her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she said again. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too.”

They hung up shortly after that. Beca slumped into her pillows, finally letting the tears she’d been holding back come to the surface.

She pressed her face into her pillow, letting the darkness that had built a home in her body overtake her, and cried herself to sleep.

//

She woke with puffy eyes and a heavy weight in her body. She wanted to skip work, to stay in bed and wallow, but she couldn’t. She had to present a first edit to a client today and she couldn’t miss it.

So she dressed slowly, got in her car and drove in some kind of daze to the studio. She went through the motions, her mind far away. 2212 miles away to be exact.

“Yo, can we turn this off!”

Beca came back to the present as the song cut off. She frowned, seeing her annoying, entitled fuck-boy client staring at her.

“I hate this.” He shook his head. “I mean, I’m the artist and this is my song. I feel like you should play my song.”

Beca rolled her eyes. It had been hard enough to take some shithead named Pimp-Lo seriously, but that song was garbage.

“Yeah, so…” Beca was tired. She was too tired for this. “It’s my job to make you the best little Pimp-Lo you can be, and as your producer, I’d like it if you could trust me.”

“Well, I’d like it if you could leave my track how it is.”

Beca sighed. “I made your song great, man.”

“Whoa there,” her supervisor interjected. “What I think Beca means is that your song was always great.”

“Um no,” Beca laughed. “What I mean is that your song was a steaming pile of --”

“Okay,” her supervisor cut her off. “Pimp-Lo, I think you should just know that Beca, here, is on her period.”

Beca saw it all in that moment. An epiphany, a dose of clarity. _This_ is what she was suffering for? She was sacrificing everything good in her life for a job that, in the moment of truth, was reduced to _this_? She was keeping herself unhappy, staying in Georgia and away from Emily for _this_.

Fuck that.

“I quit.”

//

**Emily:** I’m sorry for yesterday. I’ll be home tonight, let’s talk later okay? I love you Bec.

**Beca:** ya talk later love you too. it’ll be better soon. i promise

//

Beca had never felt nerves like this. Maybe she had made a mistake. Maybe Emily had decided they _should_ break up, and Beca had just dished out a huge chunk of savings to book a same-day flight across the country just to get dumped in person.

She didn’t believe it, really, but her hand still shook as she knocked on Emily’s apartment door.

When it swung open, she held her breath, not sure what to expect, bracing herself for whatever reaction Emily would give her.

Turned out to be a false alarm.

“Huh.” Emily’s roommate looked her up and down. “Well, you’re not the pizza dude.”

Beca gave a weak shrug. “Hey Cynthia Rose.”

“Girl.” She shook her head and turned to yell over her shoulder. “Emily! It’s for you.”

“What? CR I’m doing this reading. I already paid for the pizza, just bring it inside.”

“I said it’s for you! Damn girl.” CR rolled her eyes. “I’ll be in my room, I guess,” she said to Beca, and left her standing in the doorway.

Then Emily was coming into view, her eyebrows furrowed behind her reading glasses. When she saw Beca standing on the landing clutching nothing but her backpack, she stopped. “Beca?”

“Hey.” Beca smiled meekly. Then she was being squished to Emily’s chest in a bone-crushing hug. She grunted as Emily pulled back, her hands landing on Beca’s cheeks. She tilted Beca’s head side-to-side as if looking for injuries.

“Oh my God. You’re here? What’s wrong? You’re here. Why are you here? Wow, you’re here.”

“I’m here.”

Emily smiled so big, a wave of happiness breaking over her face so brightly that Beca felt it like a punch to the stomach. She had almost forgotten what Emily’s happiness was like. It’d been a long time since she’d seen Emily smile like _that_.

She pulled Beca inside, closing the door behind them and throwing Beca’s backpack on the floor. Her hands came back up to Beca’s face, one on Beca’s cheek, the other tucking her hair out of her face. “God. Please tell me this isn’t a dream or worse, like some kind of horrible visit where you just came here to break up with me in person.”

“No.” Beca shook her head. “I quit my job.”

Emily paused, frowning. She tilted Beca’s chin up slightly, her hands still cupped around Beca’s face. “What?”

“I quit. I’m done with that place. I hate it.”

Emily gaped at her. “You quit?”

“I quit.”

“Wow.” Emily’s thumb rubbed gently over her cheekbone. “How do you feel? Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” Beca was surprised to find she meant it. “I just was standing there, getting told all this bullshit by this client and my supervisor, and I thought, I dunno. I don’t have to take this anymore. So I quit.”

Emily’s eyes were so wide Beca almost laughed. “And now you’re… here.”

“Yeah. That job was the only thing keeping me there and I hated it, so I quit.” Beca shrugged, her cheeks heating up under Emily’s palms. “I’m tired of being apart.”

“Me too. It sucks.”

“Let’s do this. For real.” Beca had done a lot of thinking on the four hour flight there and had come to one obvious conclusion. Maybe that’s why she had been so nervous knocking on the door. It wasn’t a fear that they would break up. It was a nervousness born from taking a big step, from changing her life, from putting her heart on the line. “Let’s move in together.”

Emily stared at her, blinking slowly behind her thick frames. God she was beautiful, Beca thought. The coil in her chest sprung loose.

“Move in together? Here? Now?”

“I mean, not right this second. I didn’t bring any of my things. But like, now, yeah.” Emily still had her hands on Beca’s cheeks, but she didn’t seem to notice. “Do you want to?”

“I -- yeah. Yes. God, yes.” Emily beamed at her. “For real?”

Beca laughed. “Yeah, for real.”

“You’re serious?”

“ _Yes_.” Beca grabbed Emily by her wrists. “I’m serious. I’m gonna move here.”

Emily blinked rapidly, finally letting go of Beca’s cheeks. She covered her face with one hand, lifting her glasses to rub at her eyes. “This _so_ doesn’t feel real.”

“It’s real,” Beca said, loving the smile that tugged at Emily’s lips. It was contagious, Emily’s happiness. Beca felt warmth spreading in her chest, a crest of light seeping over the dark spot that had been there for so long.

“I don’t know what CR’s gonna make of this new roommate situation, but honestly I don’t care at the moment. We’ll figure it out.” Emily wrapped her arms around Beca’s waist, tugging her closer. “Did you fly all the way here to ask me to move in with you?”

Beca let her hands rest on Emily’s collarbones. “Partially, but mostly I just couldn’t stand not seeing you for another second.”

Emily laughed and the sound pulsed through Beca’s body. “That’s pretty romantic.”

“Oh God. Don’t start with the teasing.”

“You’re gonna have to get used to it if you wanna live with me. You’re too cute.”

Beca rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t stop her smile from widening if she tried. To save face, she did the only thing she could think of. She leaned up on her toes and pressed her lips to Emily’s.

Emily hummed into her mouth, exhaling quietly. She pulled Beca flush to her, deepening the kiss. They only broke apart when there was a sharp knock at the door.

“It’s the pizza,” Emily said against her lips. “Are you hungry?”

“Yeah.”

Emily walked Beca backward, her arms still around her waist, and opened the door. Beca blushed when the pizza man looked them up and down.

Emily gave him a wide smile. “Hi.”

“Uh. Hi.” The guy held out the pizza box and Emily took it with one hand, the other still holding Beca tightly to her by the waist.

“I put the tip on the card.”

“Right. Uh. Have a good night.”

Emily smiled wider. “I definitely will. You too!” Then she shut the door with her foot and started waddling them toward the kitchen.

“I can walk on my own, you know.”

“No,” Emily said. “If you think I’m letting go now, you’ve got another thing coming.” A door off the kitchen opened and Cynthia Rose came out, grabbing the pizza box from Emily’s hand. “Hey,” Emily chirped. “I paid for that.”

“And I’m emotionally paying by being forced to see you walking Beca around our apartment like a penguin. I’m taking a slice.”

Beca spun around so her back was to Emily’s front. Emily stuck her tongue out, her arms around Beca’s stomach. “You could’ve just asked,” Emily teased. “Beca’s gonna move in with us, by the way. Bestie code says you’re fine with it.”

Cynthia Rose snorted. “Oh does it say that? I don’t remember that in the handbook. Fine, whatever, but we’re splitting the rent three ways and Beca’s buying the pizza for a month.”

Beca leaned back into Emily’s chest, grinning. “Deal.”

“Great, so I’m just gonna…” CR gestured with her pizza slice toward her room. “Keep it down.”

“Maybe,” Emily said.

“Girl I swear to fucking God…” CR shook her head, muttering to herself, and disappeared back in her room.

Beca could feel Emily’s smile against the side of her head. “Should we bother her as payback?”

Beca chuckled, tilting her head when Emily started placing chaste kisses on her neck. “You’re a menace.”

“Yeah. You love it. And I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

Emily gasped happily. “Hey CR! Guess what! Beca loves me!”

“GOOD FOR YOU BUT I SAID KEEP IT DOWN!”

When Emily burst out laughing, a snort getting caught in her throat, Beca fell in love all over again. It seeped into her chest, rays of light to chase away the darkness of the past few months, Beca’s own little pocket of sunshine to hold.

When they lay together in bed later, curled around each other, kissing and talking, Beca thought that if she’d known certainty before this, then she must have forgotten it, because the thought of a future with Emily was the most unwavering desire she’d ever felt. It was like all that time apart had Beca winding herself up, throwing her perspective all out of line, but now that they were together, Beca was unraveling, string by string, bursting open at the seams.

When Emily loved her, her eyes on Beca’s and happiness pressing in, Beca finally came undone.

**Author's Note:**

> hmu @ emilyjunk.tumblr.com. if u like my stuff, please consider supporting my writing by donating to my ko-fi at /angelachiarmonte. thanks for reading!!


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